Last Weeks of the Quiet

Hi friend,

Happy full moon.

This October has been full of reflexions, new unexpected turns in my life, running and breathing. 

I was very close to get married (another story to tell hehe) and the last weeks of it everything got upside down. 

Now, as a believer of the higher creative force I know that it happened for a reason and for my higher good. However, I still managed to suffer a bit, feel friend's betrayal and sadness. It also gave me freedom to look at the things more openly and have less fears. My marriage, by the way was a plan for something uncommon ☺️ 

So I sat with all this sadness and let it pass through me. It felt stingy.

October was also a lot about running. I managed to get the 4th place between women in trail run of 13 km which made me feel super proud of myself and motivated to continue my runs. I dived deeper into traditional hatha yoga and followed the steps to work with my energy and clarify my mind.

I also reflected on relationships I had, the patterns I noticed, the categories of men I fell for and clarified within myself that I am ready for a comitted partnership where the other sees relationship as an opportunity to spiritually evolve, grow and create together something bigger than just one person can.

After so many years of wandering around my soul seems to be ready for depth in all aspects of my life.

I also noticed that my connection to the creator, the higher force got back in my life supporting me through lows and highs. I became friends with solitude and found peace with the worlds/mine problems. Somehow a lot of puzzle pieces got together and I could finally see a clear image.

Now sitting here and writing all this makes me smile, as I feel that I came out of that deep shadow work to see the light again. To be a child again, to play, to laugh. In the shadows of the dark I also learnt that I have nowhere to go, nothing to do. That I am in a right place at a right time. That I chose all this and that soul only wants to know the true being. That my state of being is something I can become Master of and everything else are just details. So do I choose freedom or suffering? Easy to write, I know. But I try to walk this talk too. 

So yeah, happy to be alive, happy to be digging into the dark night of my soul or whatever that was, happy to breathe and be in a right place, right time. Nowhere to go, noone to be ❤️

September Detox

Hi dear soul who reads this ❤️

I don't know if something stirs up in me because I was born on the Equinox in September but I swear this month always brings me so much discomfort, transformation and depth.

This year it continued its legacy.

The month started fun. I fell in love with the mountains around Tepoztlán, met some cool new people, had an epic adventurous roadtrip with my friend but then everything started to feel like the storm.

I started to be so overwhelmed. My scrolling habit got worse and I found too much noise out there in the waters of the internet. So many opinions, so many attention seeking people, talking more than they actually do or listen. Teaching things they have never experienced truly themselves.

So it was time to detox.

For me to quit is not so hard. I like the extremes, they have sharp edges and I understand their structures. But the balance on the other hand requires softness, flow and that doesn't always feel easy for me. But at least I shut the noise from the external.

And I found myself without any distraction sitting in the abyss of nothingness. Old fears that were formed by traumatic events in my childhood started to creep in. I saw this fearful, worrying side of myself that I don't like to show in the public. 

And I looked at it. The tears rolled down my cheeks. What is the sense in all of that? How can life can be so different. One moment you are flying down the abyss in the speed of the lightening and the other moment being in a complete bliss in awe of life's perfectly orchestrated melody. I guess that is a duality of life.

So I studied a bit of my own shadow this month. Thanks to the detox of my phone I had no quick exits. Highly recommend you that.

And when I came out of it, I felt more power flowing through me, more life force, focus, direction. My birthday opened new doors for my 35th year on this planet in this body of mine.

And as every year, I put a theme for it.

This year is COURAGE.

Courage to break my own limitations.

Courage to look deeply into the eyes of fear.

Courage to love myself truly and unconditionally.

Courage to take day at a time.

Courage to commit, to build, to create.

Courage to heal.

Courage to let go so I can create a new space for new things.

Courage to show all of myself. 

Courage to accept the help.

Courage to change a course 180 degree if needed.

Courage to be vulnerable, not only speaking but in action.

Courage.

I feel good now looking back at September. It has been quite transformational. And I am happy and looking forward to see what October brings.

Life feels soft and open at the moment ❤️

The Tribe of Cacao

Hey 😘

I am sitting on the 10 hour journey bus and my thoughts are circling around. The landscapes through the windows take my breath away. Rain really suits Mexico. All the mountains are huged in lush green trees and little colourful peeks of the houses give an idea of people living nearby.

I try to imagine these places hundreds and thousands years ago. I always do that while travelling. In fact I love travelling slow, in buses, sometimes uncomfortable but always pleasing my adventurous spirit. It is like a deep meditation retreat with ocassional phone distractions 🤪

Maybe that is why I keep on travelling, keep on hitch hiking, keep on climbing high and low, keep on savouring this amazing life.

Around this time last year I released into the world my "Tribu Del Cacao" project, my little bean to bar chocolates and cacao dream I still am walking with.

It has shown me new colours of life, it deepened my faith and oh oh my it taught me so many lessons.

It taught me patience. Delays in post, lost cacao beans, low number of clients all were part of the patience story.

It taught me to trust. That whatever is meant for you, will never pass you by. And things passed, offers, new opportunities, collaborations. However, what was truly for me, stayed. And I smell new bright doors opening in the future.

It taught me that passion sometimes need rekindling. And that meant pauses for my other hobbies and passions. If you are like me, with talents and joys in all directions, you will know what I mean.

It taught me to let go my perfectionism. Over and over. When labels just didn't have enough print to be read or the beans came too much fermented or the chocolates in full sugar bloom (people from my recent workshop, you know it 🤗).

It taught me to be brave and confident, to open myself in new directions not only as an alchemist, artist and producer but as a teacher too. And last sunday, my first out of many future workshops, proved me new powers laying within myself.

It taught me to be present, play and breath. As a Virgo Sun and ex top student at school I sometimes get too worried about details and results losing that precious present moment that is a key to my fullfilment. For some reason my "Tribu Del Cacao" project gives me some mysterious power to go beyond all my old programing.

The list goes on.

And I feel like the most wonderful feeling is to observe how through my hands and dreams, together with the spirit of cacao my chocolates and cacao reaches so many hearts with lots of inspiration then to follow their dreams. And that is my human mission. Right now is with cacao, who knows for how long I will be co creating with that Queen of the Underworld but one thing I know is that I keep walking the path of my heart.

And now it is time to enjoy the magical Tepoztlán mountains

Keep on dreaming and co creating ❤️

Ligita